FATHER'S DAY DEPRESSION

If you find yourself gearing up for a pity party today, I’ve included some stories in this post that might help you appreciate what you do have.

Father’s Day can be an overwhelming day for many people. This year has been a tough one for me and many of our staff, clients and friends.

 

If you find yourself gearing up for a pity party today, I’ve included some stories in this post that might help you appreciate what you do have.

Ten days ago, we were in family court with our client, the father of three. He was in a bitter custody battle with a soon-to-be-ex-wife that wanted him to have zero custody. To that end, she had her attorney lambaste our client with a number of horrific accusations, including that he was sexually abusing their children, ages 9, 6 and 4. During their twelve years of marriage, this was never an issue. Only when he decided to serve her with divorce papers, did this ugly issue raise its head.

Unfortunately, these accusations have to still be fully evaluated by the court. The misery for our client is he gets to spend Father’s Day with his three children under the thumb of a court-appointed monitor until these issues are fully resolved.

In January, a friend of mine (and a client) was driving his two children to a sporting event. A drunken driver ran a red light and killed both his children for unthinkable misery. He will be spending Father’s Day at the cemetery.

We have a well-known and respected couple as business clients for over thirty years. A few months ago, they called me with a criminal matter. Their son was accused of using drugs and/or alcohol to excess which resulted in the killing of a fellow patron at a local concert. Their misery was compounded while trying to figure out why their son brought a knife to a dance club. They will be spending Father’s Day with their son in jail.

Frank and Marcy were delighted this year to bring a baby girl into this world on Valentine’s Day. She has not yet been home, spending the last months in the ICU with a defective heart that desperately needs to be replaced. No donor has yet been found, prolonging their misery. They will be spending Father’s Day in the hospital.

A long-time attorney friend and client, who was a avid runner, ran his last race in April of this year. When he reached the summit of the mountain trail, he suffered a major heart attack and died. His wife and four children will be spending Father’s Day with photos, videos and memories.

If you find yourself today in the most miserable situation because of a father or a child, remember the words of Euripides and try to forgive and then forget by knowing, “Human misery must somewhere have a stop, there is no wind that always blows a storm.”

Fathers: Perhaps you can forgive your children any misdeeds or heartache they have caused. They’re not perfect, and neither are you.

Children: Provided the nature of the perceived misdeeds are relatively small, maybe you can let the past remain there.  You’re not perfect, and neither are your parents.

Neither of you accomplish anything by ALWAYS reliving history and making their mistakes your constant banter for how the world has wronged your life.

Happy Father’s Day everyone.